What Women Healers Over 50 Are Really Thankful For (And No, It’s Not More Work)
(Hint: It’s Not More Work. Not More Responsibility. And Definitely Not More Invisible Labor.)
If you ask a woman healer over 50 what she’s thankful for, she’ll give you the polite list first—
the one she’s been trained to recite since she was young:
“My family.”
“My job.”
“The opportunity to help people.”
“The roof over my head.”
And of course those things matter.
But they’re not the whole truth.
Because if you peel back the layers—beneath the clinical expertise, the decades of caregiving, the emotional labor no one sees—there’s another truth waiting underneath:
Women healers over 50 aren’t thankful for the things that drain them.
They’re thankful for the tiny, sacred moments that help them feel like themselves again.
And that truth is revolutionary.
What We’re NOT Thankful For (Let’s Just Say It)
Let’s clear the air as lovingly and directly as possible:
Women in healthcare and helping professions are not thankful for:
• Being the unofficial emotional support human for their entire family
• Carrying the invisible labor list that magically regenerates overnight
• Working twice as hard for half the recognition
• Sitting through meetings that absolutely could’ve been an email
• Feeling responsible for everyone else’s regulation
• The pressure to “be grateful” for things that are clearly draining
That’s not gratitude.
That’s conditioning.
And this time of year?
That conditioning hits like an overcooked turkey.
The Psychology Behind “Performative Gratitude”
Let’s bring in the research.
Harvard’s School of Public Health
shows that genuine gratitude strengthens wellbeing, improves sleep, and boosts emotional resilience.
But here’s the kicker:
When gratitude is forced, it has the opposite effect.
Your stress hormones increase.
Your nervous system overloads.
Your body literally feels heavier.
Why?
Because fake gratitude is emotional bypassing, and your body always knows.
UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center
found that women—especially those in caring professions—are more likely to use gratitude as a way to suppress their own needs.
It’s not because you don’t know better.
It’s because you’ve been trained to override your exhaustion with:
“Be grateful you’re even here.”
So you say the words,
but your body calls B.S.
So What ARE Women Healers Over 50 Thankful For?
After 30 years of teaching, counseling, supervising, coaching, and sitting in the trenches with helping professionals, here’s what I know for sure:
Women healers over 50 are thankful for things that restore them—
not things that drain them.
They’re thankful for…
Quiet mornings
before anyone needs anything.
A body that’s still fighting for them
even after decades of being ignored in service to others.
Saying NO without the guilt hangover
that used to last for days.
Friendships with women who GET IT
—the kind where no one asks you to explain why you’re tired.
A full, uninterrupted night of sleep
which feels like winning the emotional lottery.
Time to themselves that isn’t stolen
in three-minute increments between obligations.
Their own damn recliner
and the quiet joy of not moving.
One moment—just one—
where they feel like themselves again.
That’s not small.
That’s radiance.
That’s healing.
That’s the truth we don’t say enough.
Root & Solar Plexus Chakras: Why This Season Hits Hard
Let’s bring in a little energy work—
because your burnout doesn’t live only in your mind;
it lives in your body.
🔴 Root Chakra (Safety, Grounding, Stability)
When your Root is imbalanced, you feel responsible for everyone.
You over-function.
You brace.
You anticipate everyone else’s needs before they even express them.
You confuse survival with people-pleasing.
Midlife healers?
Your Root has been carrying the weight of the world for 30+ years.
🟡 Solar Plexus (Agency, Boundaries, Personal Power)
When this chakra dims, you:
• Feel guilty for resting
• Take on “just one more thing”
• Forget that your needs matter
• Carry responsibility that isn’t yours
This time of year pulls hard on both centers.
Family expectations.
Work deadlines.
Emotional labor Olympics.
Everyone needing—and needing—you.
But when these chakras light back up?
You stop surviving.
You start rising.
A 30-Second Radiance Reset (Yes, It Works)
This grounding practice balances both chakras and regulates your nervous system.
Step 1: Plant your feet
Imagine your feet anchoring into the earth—
like you’re plugging yourself back into your own power source.
Step 2: One hand on your belly
This reconnects you to your Solar Plexus and your breath.
Inhale for 4… exhale for 6.
Step 3: Say this out loud:
“I release gratitude that costs me my peace.”
“I am thankful for the woman I am becoming.”
“My joy is not optional.”
Your nervous system just whispered,
“Oh… she remembers me.”
💬 Humor Break (Because Healing Doesn’t Have to Be Depressing)
If one more person tells you,
“You should be grateful—they mean well,”
just smile sweetly and say:
“I am grateful. I’m also tired. Those two things can co-exist, Susan.”
Or if you’re on the ranch like me:
“Even Larry the bull gets tired. And nobody’s asking HIM to be grateful.”
Humor is medicine.
Especially when the world expects you to be a gratitude vending machine.
The Real Revelation: Radiance Comes From Truth
Radiance doesn’t come from perfection.
Or martyrdom.
Or over-functioning.
Or eight hours of forced gratitude.
Radiance comes from truth.
Your truth.
Your needs.
Your boundaries.
Your joy.
Your exhaustion.
Your reclamation.
Women healers over 50 don’t rise when they pretend everything’s fine.
They rise when they finally tell the truth
about what they’re tired of—
and what they want back.
And if all you want this year is a quiet room, a warm beverage, and a moment where no one needs anything from you?
That is holy.
That is sacred.
That is enough.
Ready for Your Next Step?
Choose the support that fits your season:
1. The Compassion Fatigue Cure Starter Guide
A science-backed, soul-deep framework to help midlife healers understand their compassion fatigue patterns—and start reclaiming their joy.
Closing Reflection
This year, be grateful for what restores you.
Not what drains you.
Not what is expected of you.
Not what you’ve tolerated for decades.
Be grateful for:
the moments that bring you back home—to yourself.
Your radiance isn’t gone.
It’s rising.
